31 Jan '08 -
The power supply went out on my desk top PC a while ago so last night I decided to ut a new one in. I ripped the old one out and went to the PC store. It closed at six, and I got there fifteen minutes prior. It was closed. What was next door? The sex shop where I bought those two toys for my wife. What was next door to the sex shop? Why, it is that little Mexican bar the wife and I like!
Ellie was at Taras getting her hair done. I was waiting for a call to pick her up.
As luck would have it, we were having a huge arctic wind storm and the wind blew me right through the door and as luck again would have it, a bar stool stopped me from hitting the floor. Lucky me.
Hotty McCleavage was tending bar again! I am lucky. She greeted me, asking where my wife was. What a freakin' memory, we only went there twice before and she remembers from over two weeks ago?
Turns out Hotty McCleavage has a name! Who Knew? It is Amanda. She volunteered it. I now remember I didn't give my name back! What the fuck is wrong with me and my crap social skills? I am inept. On a scale of 1 to 10 of smooth pick upiness, 1 being the low end (Woody Allen) and 10 being the high end (Brad Pitt), I'm a minus two (Jabba the Hutt).
A couple walks in and sits next to me. The guy fucks off somewhere and the woman puts her keys on the bar. And its a Habs key ring. For those of you who don't know, the Habs are the Montreal Canadiens. Yes Canadiens is spelled right, its French, there should be an accent over the 'e' but I'm using an english keyboard.
I'm from Montreal, I'm a Habs fan, and as I'm about to mention it Amanda squeels out that she is a Habs fan too. The packed bar starts booing. We are in either in Leaf or Sabre country.
There is a term for when a guy is chatting up a girl and another guy interferes; it's called cock blocking. But when a girl interferes is it called c___t blocking? Or is it still cock blocking? Does the original term imply that my cock is being blocked? If so then cock blocking applies to that scenario. But If the term cock blocking means the interfering guy is using his cock to block my moves the in lasts night case the term would be c__t blocking. I'll use that term. I was c__t blocked last night.
Still, I had a great threeway conversation going. Guys were watching from all around. When Amanda had to serve them she would she will be right back. I got her story, 26, student no boyfriend live about an hour away. I really said fuck all, remember my inept scale?..It was still in full effect.
The other girl was my age,mid forties, her eldest was Amandas age. I guess she could be classified as a M.I.L.F. (Moms I'd Like to Fuck).
Three drinks later I get a call and head to the front foyer where its quiet to answer my phone. The wife is ready. I go back in to settle my tab and there is another drink. Amanda assumed I wanted another. I did but three was good for driving, so I drank it and paid my four drink tab.
At Taras I just sat there. Tara asked me if I wanted my hair cut, and I said no thank I just spent my drink money! My drink money? I meant to say my haircut money. Too much to drink I guess. So I sat and stared at my wifes breasts and I guess I stared a bit too hard as she told me to stop staring at them! Tara aked if she could stare at them!!! My wife said of course!!!
So, it was a pretty good night for me, my wife looks stunning with her beautiful hair, I saw Tara for a bit, too short of a time if you ask me and I spent almost two hours talking with two strange women!
Is this what it means to be social? To have that extra paycheck and do something like that and not worry what your cutting out of the budget in the next two weeks? It is fantastic. Sorry for the long run on sentence.
It has been so long since I did that that I truly forgot how nice it is to go out. Obviously I also forgot how to properly hold my end of the conversation up too, but I'll learn. I promise myself that.
